Historically, women believed sex and menopause simply could not co-exist. Women like my grandmother whole-heartedly thought once you stopped having a period, the sex was over. Close up the shop and call it a day—the fun ride is kaput!
We can all agree that menopause is a life-changing experience. I did not realize the gravity of the situation until ‘the change’ started happening with me. What makes menopause so hard to swallow is there is no advanced warning of how it will affect your sex life. One day you’re horny, and the next, you feel like chopping your lover into tiny little pieces.
Menopause has some unexpected twists which include annoying hot flashes, homicidal mood swings, reduction in libido, and chin whiskers that are making my cats jealous. But it’s also been filled with amazing changes too! I now look at sex and menopause from a whole different perspective. Yes, the frustration, anxiety, and confusion are still there. But I’ve found a way of embracing the change and boosting my sex life!
This is how I took sex and menopause into my own hands.
The Great Liberation
The Netflix show Grace & Frankie really hit the nail on the head. I nearly peed myself while watching the two main characters (Jane Fonda and Lilly Tomlin) searching for someone to finance their new line of sex toys for post-menopausal women. Then it hit me—we need more age appropriate sex toys for women like us!
Here are just a few ideas that can really help boost your orgasms during and after menopause:
Low Libido Be Damned
The L’Amourose Rosa Rouge Heated Vibe is the remedy for any menopausal blues. This vibe is equipped with a series of vibrational patterns that can be customized with a touch of a button. Its shape is unlike the traditional vibe and has a handle that is easy to grip with swollen, achy hands. But what makes the Rosa Rouge remarkably special is the Thermal Heating Unit. Hot flashes aside, I love how the heat feels soothing going in and out. It’s a nice treat after a long day at work and a great toy for enhancing your libido.
Momma’s Little Helper
The night sweats combined with anxious thoughts prevents me from getting a good night’s sleep. Fortunately, I found that having an intense orgasm before heading off to bed helps unwind my body and mind. Another issue I’ve been facing is arousal. The decrease in libido takes me a while to get warmed up. I even have moments when an orgasm seems unlikely. The Womanizer Pro remedies this problem by offering quick stimulation and climax. I prefer using this sex toy when my energy is low because it does not require friction or a lot of movement. I simply place the suction nozzle on my clit and have an orgasm within 30 seconds.
Lubricants are going to be your best friend during menopause. As estrogen levels drop, the vagina can become thinner and dryer, which causes painful intercourse. I keep a healthy supply of Aloe Cadabra on hand. This aloe-enriched lube does a great job in keeping me wet and instantly absorbs when the fun ride is done. Aloe Cadabra does not have harsh or drying chemicals and keeps my vagina happy.
Workout in Bed
Weight gain is an issue for a lot of women going through menopause. The extra pounds can make some women feel less than sexy. Even though I’ve added some extra padding to my ass, it still does not stop me from having sex. Instead of going to the gym I lay my big, beautiful ass on the Wedge and let my husband do all the work.
Menopause does not mean locking up the goodie basket and tossing the key. Nor does it take away our sexual viability. For me, menopause is exactly how my mother describes it: a great liberation. I’m not bothered by periods. I don’t have young kids ruining the moment. I can have sex in any room of my house. When it all comes down to it—older women like us know exactly what they want and no longer have to place sexuality on the back burner. Think Mrs. Robinson in The Graduate. She had it going on and so can you—the greatest sex on earth!